Paranoid Potty training

I've given in. With Molly, I waited until she was nearly 3 years old to potty train her. I just don't have the ability to stay home for more than 4 hours at a time, and so it gets quite difficult.
It's funny how you forget all those difficult moments in child rearing (if we didn't forget we wouldn't have multiple children) and then it all comes sweeping back when you repeat a process..

With Molly I drove her and myself mad. I put her on the potty every 5 minutes and she still had a million accidents, until we were on holiday in Tenerife. Molly was standing in the middle of the toddler pool. I was sitting on the edge reading a book and keeping an eye on her and all the other british children (unwritten parent rule on holiday, all the British kids are under your watchful eye, because you know if you DO take your eye off the ball, there are other parents watching your kid for you). Suddenly she shouts out, loud enough for most of the guests in the hotel to hear - MUMMY, I NEED A WEE!!! Proud but lazy, I secretly though to myself, you're in a pool and you're wearing a swimming nappy, just go. But to encourage her, I ran into the pool, scooped her up in my arms and tried to run, without slipping on the wet concrete, what seemed to be about a half mile run to the nearest toilet. When we came back, there were lots of smile of encouragement from other parents and my smugness overtook my laziness.

So now i'm doing it all again.
Once again, with Lucy, the toilet training sort of started on holiday (this time in Gran Canaria - I do like my Spanish Islands) and the novelty of being able to shout in the middle of the hotel restaurant - I NEED THE TOILET. So literally every 15 minutes during mealtimes (me thinks she was trying to get away from maincourses and she knew if you left your plate for a few minutes it would get cleared away - bring on the ice cream). This also worked by the pool and despite being in nappies and swim nappies, I took her each and every time.  Her nappies would still be wet though, so not sure how much of this training malarky she was really taking in.
And now with a couple of days off before work again, and almost a week before she goes back to her childminder, we're doing it "properly!". Bribes of yoghurt coated raspberries are working a treat, although Molly is looking quite enviously on, and I have to be strict not to reward her with "sweets" when Lucy uses the potty. Day one, we went through Lucy's knickers and a few pairs of Molly's too. Almost onto mine, so not the best start.
Day two and we realise that we get rewarded- I have NEVER seen a child do so many wees in a potty and the proudest moment was when she was in the garden playing (of course have a potty in the garden), and she ran in to her potty in the lounge (sorry guys but its the easiest location to have it) and pulled her NEW knick knocks down to do a massive wee.

Day three now, and I've almost stopped asking every 10 minutes and leaving it at least every 12 minutes to ask. But the next stage is to take the well managed potty training out of the house and into public domain. Already I'm having mini panic attacks and restocking the former nappy bag with the 10 pairs of knickers I bought her yesterday. I have a potty in the boot of the car and will offer it to anyone looking after my daughter for the next year or so...
Wish me luck that this continues in the manner is has started.....

and for your culinary enjoyment, this is a cake I made for year one's end of term picnic! 31 Jelly babies for the 31 gorgeous kids in Molly's class.

Are you living your own life or somebody else's?... and a great gymnast cake

A bit of a serious one this month, and apologies it has been over a month since I last posted, but there are only so many children's birthday parties you can write about, and that has taken up so much of my time (fun but not to read). 

So I was thinking about what to write about, and having had my "happy" head on for the past 100 days, I looked around me at those who might not be so optimistic and I looked into their lives and how they conduct themselves and most of the time, when I see people who aren't happy with themselves, its easy to see why. They are living their lives as to how other people want them to be.

When you grow up, you are very much governed by your parents. They are the people who will (most of the time) guide you and influence your way of thinking, but when you grow up, there has to be a time when you can think for yourself, and at the risk of upsetting your parents (albeit usually only temporary), you need to take that step, think about your action and decide how much will you upset your parents compared to how much can you improve your own wellbeing. They will get over it, surely they want the best for their children, even if thats when you're in your 30's and 40's. Be brave, explain why you're doing it and remember, they're getting old and grumpy and you're still young and fun!

And partners! Wives, husbands, boyfriends and girlfriends! Why do we choose each other? Most of the time its because we fall in love, find our soul mates, fancy the pants off each other etc. so why should that change once we're all settled together? Why are so many partners scared of their other halves? Why should we tread on eggshells around each other? We live in the twenteens, where we are all equal and have the right and means to say and do what we want. If you partner doesn't support you, tell them that you want them to! Tell them that your partnership asks for support and they ought to have a damn good reason to oppose your exciting plans. And on the flipside of that, think about what you say before you put down your partner and mock their decisions. Just because you are partners, doesn't mean you lose feeling! You know that as well as they do!

And work. So we've been through some tough times in the economy but things are getting better and jobs are materialising. So if you hate your job, why stick at it? Yes, you need the money thats obvious, you've got a house to run and a family to feed, but why sit at a desk where you get bullied every day? Why do you put up with it? If your partner/children were doing the same, you would (hopefully) go mental at them and tell them to start looking for a new job straight away. Why do you have to stay in the same industry your whole life? Retrain and do something you actually like doing. There is something out there for everyone, but you have to look for it, and want it, and then GO FOR IT!

It's not rocket science (unless that's what you want to train in) but its thinking about yourself, and realising that actually if you make yourself happy, those around you will be happy (it's infectious), you will thrive in your life and encourage others to do the same. 

If you're not happy SPEAK OUT, what's to be afraid of? Give it a go and see how it pan's out.

And in the meantime, check out my gymnastic cake I made last week. Remember, cakes are made to order.... ;)

Starlight Walk for The Peace Hospice

The Peace Hospice is a charity based in Watford caring for people with life limiting illnesses and their families in south west hertfordshire.  It was started in 1925  and over many difficult years it has had its ups and downs, and was even closed down in 1988 after the building was vandalised and was falling into disrepair. Even the historic clock that was there from 1924 was stolen from the facade.

After public outcry an office above the Hospice shop was set up and campaigning started in 1991. By 1993 it had raised enough money for a temporary day care centre in a portacabin alongside Watford General Hospital. It was opened by legendary entertainer Roy Castle.

Gradually, funds were raised to move the centre back to where the old hospital building had been and building work began in 1995, with the new location being opened by Princess Michael of Kent the following year. Five years later, the princess returned to open a new wing with 11 inpatient beds.

In 2005 the hospice started a Hospice at Home service and in 2008 they added two new inpatient rooms.

The hospice is growing and supported throughout the local community but continue to look for donations and fundraising, as they require £4m a year to run  and develop their services.

The Peace Hospice Care provides medical, physical, emotional, social and spiritual care, comfort and support to people who have been diagnosed with a terminal illness and also their families.

Its services include:

1.    In-patient Unit: 12 fully equipped home from home type rooms which all have direct access to the garden, for when people need to stay with us for a while, either to provide respite, or due to medical need.

2.    The Starlight Centre:

The hospice provides information, support and care as soon as a diagnosis is made so that people can be supported in living as positively and as well as they can, for as long as possible. There are a range of services including legal advice, social care support, classes such as yoga, meditation, art therapy, group meetings and HOPE courses amongst other services which can all be accessed by people who are leading full lives and visit the Hospice to attend specific sessions.

3.    Hospice at Home:

People who are able and would prefer to be supported in their own home can be through the Hospice at Home Service.

4.   Counselling:

The hospice provides counselling for adults and children and a range of complementary therapies such as reflexology and massage therapy, for patients and family members affected.

5.    Education and Support for Young people:

The hospice provides support, education and training to teachers and students in primary and secondary schools to assist them in supporting each other if a young person is going to be bereaved of someone close to them. Bereaved children also visit the Hospice to attend support groups where they can meet other young people in the same situation, and begin the journey of coming to terms with serious illness or loss in the family.

ALL OF THE SERVICES OFFERED BY THE HOSPICE ARE FREE OF CHARGE.

And for this reason I shall be doing the ‘Starlight Walk’ for Peace Hospice Care today, Saturday 21st June. I didn't realise how far 6 miles actually is. We start at the Watford Colosseum, walk all the way down Rickmansworth Road, past the Harvester (ooh can get a takeaway) up the hill, past my friend Gills House, all the way to the Ricky School, along Croxley Green, down Baldwin's lane to the bottom (near enough to wave at Scott and Claire, and the Simpkins) then back through Cassiobury park all the way back to the Colossuem. We're starting at 9pm, and my team leader for Arnett Hills Lucky stars is a beautiful 11 year old - Hayley.  If you can still support us, anything would be grateful for this amazing charity. 

https://mydonate.bt.com/fundraisers/alexisnoble1

OK, two days later and I have cake!!!
I have Portuguese Custard tarts to be honest. Enjoy! They are delicious.

Take care 

Pessimism, and why I don't get it. .... and an amazing Sophia the First cake

I forgot that I wrote my last blog about emotions, so this one could be linked, so sorry. I'll try and think of something funny to write about next time, or review the next bit of market research I'm doing for you.

But today is all about Pessimism and why I can't understand people who are pessimistic (and why I can't spell it very well).  As you may or may not know, I am very optimistic. Maybe too optimistic that I piss a lot of people off, so optimistic, that when things don't go the way I planned them to, I just think how it will go to plan next time and everything will be wonderful! That is why I buy lottery tickets every week. Someone has to win eventually, why can't it be me?  The glass is definitely half full over this way, and if its virtually empty, there is still that reminder of how lovely that glass was when it was full and aren't I lucky to have had it.

My darling husband (who doesn't actually read my blogs, so I can say what I want about him) and many more of my friends and family are Pessimists. So how are they still alive? Not that I wish them dead or anyone for that matter (well, there is the odd serial killer blah blah who I wouldn't miss if they were gone), but how can they live their rich and fruitful lives with so much pessimism around them?

The Pessimist will receive a party invitation and think - it might be a crap party, why should I go? The optimist will be choosing what to wear even though the party is months away.
The Pessimist will look out on a sunny day (like today) and think, bloody hell, this is no good for the grass growing;  its going to be hot in the car later; I'll get heatstroke in this weather blah blah....
The optimist is out there with their factor 30 on. The sun is out for gods sake! No time to moan!

So why do pessimists survive? Surely they don't go out anywhere, or do anything because it might turn out crap, or they might not like what they see, or who they're with.
They can't have conversations with friends and family because the others might get the wrong end of the stick and misinterpret what they are saying.
Can't have a party or even invite one person over for dinner, because if they decline (for reasons unknown to the pessimist) then that's a person smack round the face to say I hate you and never want to come to your house/party (unless its at a time when I am free).
Pessimists complain about their jobs, and complain when they don't have a job. They complain about the weather, they complain about what to eat.
STOP COMPLAINING AND BEING SO PESSIMISTIC AND LIVE YOUR LIFE!

I watched a programme the other night on the people of Brazil, living in their Favelas. They have nothing. Most of them don't have roofs that keep them dry when it rains. They sell the rubbish surrounding their homes to live. They don't always get paid on time, but they smile! They smile because they have hope and faith. A lot of this comes down to religion, and I am not a religious person, but even the pessimistic hubby could see how religion keeps a lot of these people alive, because they are hoping and believing that things will work out for the good.

People over here should look at that and pay attention. By no means am I saying, give up everything you have and live in  Favelas, but look at what you have and look how lucky you are and who is around you, and who loves you and remember that even if they are not there when you want them tomorrow, they will be there next week. And next week will be so much more fun than tomorrow, but tomorrow we will be excited for next week and think of more things to get excited about.
Stop trying to pick fights with someone to feed your own pessimism, its not healthy. If you're stuck in a situation you're not happy with, or people you're not so fond of but have to be around (we all know who we're thinking of), get over it, think positively, think optimistically and think how you can benefit your lives as well as theirs!  You may still not like them but you can think of optimistic ways to bide your time with them!!

Now, before I go and buy another lottery ticket, check out my cake I baked for Molly's 6th Birthday party. It was a joint party with her friend Elyse. The girls had a fantastic time and all the cake got eaten :)

People eating my cake is enough to boost my optimism permanently!!

The top half was chocolate, the bottom half wheat and dairy free. Both were deliciously moist and very very tasty!!

Emotions ... and my first Frozen inspired cake

Emotions - funny old thing aren't they! Some people are riddled with them, like fleas on a stray dog, and others have the bare necessity to get them through life as normal as possible (i.e. i'm not talking serial killers here).
But one thing that has come to light in recent times, is that despite getting older, getting married, settling into routines and comfort zones, becoming parents and putting all your energies into raising the kids as happily and responsibly as possible, those emotions you felt in the school playground, outside McDonalds on a Sunday evening or in the nightclubs on Student night, haven't actually gone away.

Its strange isn't it. We become so responsible for other people, whether its our children or boss, or elderly parents, that we assume we should grow out of thinking the things we do, because life doesn't actually have the time or space for them. But we don't.

In the school playground, I remember as a child my best friend telling me she didn't like me any more and going off with another friend. They left me alone and I was devastated, my world had ended. The next day we were best friends again, silly playground antics. In the nightclubs, friends and I would spot the guys we wanted to pull. If we both happened to spot the same guy, some reasoning would be had, to either bagsy him first or leave him alone. The hurt when I caught my best friend snogging the guy I'd been telling her about all night broke my heart.  I pulled someone else about an hour later but we didn't talk until she dumped him a week later. When I first got my driving licence, suddenly I became really popular. It was an amazing feeling, until I realised that actually I was only being used for my wheels. I soon decided that petrol was more valuable than fake friends and chose my riders more carefully.
Really petty things that mean the world to us while we are younger, but actually, in different circumstances still jump up and bite us on the bum today.

I just find it really strange that firstly we do still react so emotionally, if an event gets postponed/cancelled/changed and you're the last one to find out, surely we should be pleased that we get extra time to spend with the kids or doing something at home with our loved ones, not pondering on why we weren't part of the change and always asking the question "what did I do wrong" or "why is my opinion not important".
How about, a translation into modern terms, if you post a really cute picture of your kids on facebook. People see it, and can show their fondness of the photo by "liking" it. So if a friend, who you know has been on the site, doesn't "like" it, it can be heartbreaking! But why should we care. 53 other people, some of whom we barely even know have liked our photo, so why does it matter if one person doesn't?

Emotional actions (rather than REactions) are often carried out in moments of jealousy, but at our old age, surely we should get over our jealousies, and accept that we have indeed made our beds, now we have to lie in them, and if our friends have something we don't have, why can't we be happy for them, they are our friends after all. Jealousy though, leads to spitefulness and spitefulness is a horrible emotion to be on the end of. Being ignored by friends, having your loved ones ignored by your "friends" or having snide comments said about you are all really hurtful. EVEN for people in their 30's and 40's.

I still can't get over how we still react in such a way, and on so many occasions I want to shout "Grow up" to my friends, and even to myself when I look in the mirror, but instead I will spend a few days dwelling on what I could have done wrong to become the bad guy all of a sudden, heart skips a beat, checking Facebook for any clues....  I'm going to spend the last bit of my 30's training my emotions to come out only when needed, and the rest of the time I will stick two fingers up at the situations and get back to playing princess castles with those who matter most to me!

A little emotional rant today, but now, as I'm not fussed about anything other people are up to right now (as long as they are safe, well and happy) here is my Olaf cake. I'm pretty proud of this one, if I might say so myself!!

#100happydays - its a good thing... And a hidden surprise cake!

Hi everyone,
Hope you're keeping well and enjoying the sun which finally came out today.
Wanted to blog today about something I saw on Facebook and have actually decided to do myself. I'm usually anti all these do this, like that, play this on FB because frankly they're all a load of crap. But I love a challenge and 100 happy days is a challenge to think of something every day (ideally with a photo) that makes you happy.
Corny you might say? But actually not only is it a bit of a challenge, but also, by thinking daily of something that's made you happy, you're thinking positive thoughts.

How to do it, if you think your life is a bit dull or crap...
Firstly, do you have kids? If so, and even if they are the most annoying, spoiled children in the world, I bet there are things they do that make you stop and smile at them. For example, listening to a child singing, or playing a game when they really don't think you're listening, or hearing that they did well at school, or watching them being nice to a pet or another animal.

Don't have kids? Be happy that you get to sleep all night, can go to the toilet on your own and can have a phone conversation without being interrupted continuously!

What about Nature? Its the littlest things that can be added to my 100 happy days. Sunshine for example is a great one. Did you notice how happy everyone seemed today because the sun came out? Or look at the butterflies and birds out doing their thing. If you stop for a minute just to watch the world passing by, I challenge you NOT to smile at it.

Eaten something nice? Food is always fun, and when you go out for lunch to get a regular sandwich and accidently end up with something that tastes sooooo good, you can't help but smile at your achievement. I remember doing this in a Shell Petrol Station once. Who'd expect thats where the best sandwiches in the world are made, and to make it better, and what made me smile even more, was that I emailed Shell to tell them I thought their Sandwiches were ace, and they sent me a £5 voucher to say thank you! I definitely smiled then.

Friends and acquantances. Sometimes we're too quick to criticise or find fault in the people we're around every day. Complacency leads to boredom and boredom leads to trouble making. Pretend that you're new in town and you're becoming acquainted with these people all over again, and remember why you chose them as friends, or why you laugh at work so much all over again. Failing that, imagine them in their undies!!

Strangers, if all the above is failing, and nothing is making you smile. Try something completely new. Go and speak to a total stranger. It could be someone in a supermarket, someone at the bus stop or someone walking in the same direction as you! As long as you don't turn into some mad stalker-like person, and frighten your stranger off, then this can be just as rewarding to put a smile on your face.

And do you know what's best? If you smile every day for 100 days, you will continue beyond this, if for 100 days you can find something to be happy about, I bet you can for 100 more and suddenly, life becomes good, life becomes enjoyable and life is worth living.

My lecture for the day. I hope it made you happy! And if not, check out this cake with a hidden star agenda in the middle. That should make you happy!

Facebook .... my do's and don'ts!

So i've been thinking about what to blog for a couple of days. Not that life is boring and I don't have anything to rant about, but I like to keep my blogs as amusing and informative as possible. I don't want to write a diary for you to read because some of my life is PRIVATE!
So Today's blog, especially for those of you not on FB (Facebook) is about this wonderful website that has made one young man pretty rich and lots of people rich with information.
So here is my list...
1.  DO - Befriend people you know from childhood but have no intention of ever seeing again!
My hubby says, why go on facebook. If you want to see someone just give them a call and meet up, but the joy of facebook is purely the fact that you don't have to meet anyone you can't be bothered to, or don't really have the time for. You just befriend them and occasionally write them a note or like their photos. They feel loved, you feel popular! Its what its all about.
2.  DON'T- Befriend Ex boyfriends that you still fancy though.
They will have moved on and you'll only be jealous of them
3.  DO - Put lots of lovely photos of your kids, dogs, guinea pigs and days out on there. People are nosy and love looking at your photos, and its a great opportunity to show the world how gorgeous your kids/animals/self is.
4.  DON'T wash your dirty laundry in public, especially if you're not going to actually write what the hell is wrong. Don't put on your post "Oh Shit, can't believe that has happened to me...." You'll get lots of very nosy people asking whats wrong. If you wanted to tell them, you would have posted the full "Oh Shit, can't believe that I've crashed my car, got sacked from work and caught my brother in bed with my husband", and any real friends you would have texted in private!
5. DO Share those funny postcard type pictures that say things like, " If I want to get my children's attention I just have to answer the phone to someone or go to the Loo". It makes us realise that everyone is in the same parent situation, and its not just your own children who don't understand that when you're on the phone you want them to shut up, and when you're on the loo you want the door SHUT!
6. DON'T share those sentimental posts about loving your daughter, or dead people or Autism week (which seems to be every week) etc. We do all appreciate those special to us, but there is no value to "Share if you love your daughter too"
7. DO enter competitions via Facebook. I've won LOADS already, from the likes of RUCOMFY bean bags, to One Stop Convenience Stores hamper of Easter Eggs.
8. DON'T post political opinion if you don't really know what you're talking about. There is nothing worse than reading one side of an argument, shouting about it on FB, only for someone to come back and put you right back in your place.
9. DO use Facebook to criticise large, well-known brands who have pissed you off no end. Talking to customer services on the phone is a private one to one, where you can be fobbed off with any talk, but get public on FB where others can read it, and you tend to get the proper customer service response you deserve. Don't you Tesco Mobile!!? ;)
10. DON'T invite me to play Candy Crush!

My cake this week hasn't actually been baked yet. So you'll have to come back to that, but here is a picture of my brother's birthday cake I made back in November. Thinking I need to make another one like it again!