Shared parental leave. What do we really think?

Thank you government, for giving us a choice. As of 5th April 2015, parents have the choice of shared parental leave (SPL). This means that any time after the first 2 weeks of a mothers maternity leave (or 4 if she works in a factory), she can share the remaining year of parental leave with her partner.

In the grand scheme of things, this is actually a great idea. It puts to bed the idea that the man might be the "breadwinner" in the family and thus, the woman in the lower paid role can stay at home with baby, but so many more women are so successful in their own right. They have their careers, their independence and the right to have a child (birth or adopt). Why should their careers suffer as a result of doing the most natural thing and bringing a child into the world. From a psychological side too, it isn't always easy for a new mother to adjust. Bringing up a baby can actually be a very lonely affair, when you are stuck at home with a colicky baby. When you don't know where to go to take the baby out to meet people and make friends, and baby's are HARD WORK! I think the option to pass some of this over to the partner to share will reduce post natal depression, and bring back some normality to those who require it.

From the partners view, this also will reduce a great amount of potential post natal depression for the daddy/ partner, as so often, they get their two weeks leave and then have to return to the grind, back to normal without the joys and the shared responsibilities of those first months. It can be very depressing for a partner, who has also gone through this major life-changing experience, but doesn't get the opportunity to learn and share in this new life growing up. 

So, as a general summary, what a great idea. Great for the mother, the partner and also the baby who understands and recognises those about him very, very quickly. A simple, yet effective tool, that doesn't cost the government and the tax payer anything additional, yet adds so much value.

HOWEVER, having just said all of that, and having had two beautiful babies of my own (now aged 6 and 3) I wouldn't share! Call me selfish, but after two very long pregnancies (well probably the same as most people, I'm no elephant), having put on 5 stone for each one, so much discomfort, changes in hormones, and two c-sections. I wouldn't have given up my year off for the world. I enjoyed every second of bringing up baby, going out to find all the new local baby clubs, trying a bit of massage, yoga and really finding my feet in Costa Coffee with my new found friends and my cute little baby. I took the time to rest (sort of). A summer of strolling through the park with the buggy and the dog, but also making sure the washing, cooking and cleaning was done. Taking the opportunity to be a house wife before it passed by only too quickly and I had to go back to work! I now sit at work, dreaming about those carefree days of strolling, coffees, baby clubs, toddler groups, silly songs and little giggles. What my husband doesn't know won't upset him. If we'd have shared all of that, he might still be off now, being the house husband, enjoying his freedom, but not quite getting in ALL the corners with the duster!