I had a thought at 3am this morning, when I went in to settle my 18 month old toddler for the third time... and my thought it that people who tell me their babies slept through the night permanently from 3 weeks or whenever are either liars, exaggerators or deaf!
Chatting with mothers of first borns is very different to those with numerous children, and it is so easy to spot a first time mother a mile off.
A first time mother will generally only tell you the really positive things about their LO (little one I gather) unless they desperately need help. A mother of numerous children will tell it like it is. The conversation of sleep is one of the main topics that are brought up in comparable motherhood, and as I can never win that one, I have now taken the stance in self pride of not having slept through a whole night in almost 5 and a half years now! Wohoo! Check me out.
Many people I have spoken to will tell me that their babies sleep through, up to 12 hours a night (some even more but they may have mistaken their baby for Baby Annabel, you just never know). I think these people are seriously mistaken and here is an example as to my conclusion -
I was talking to a first time mum (and actually a 2nd time mum too) who both swore their children sleep through the night. Obviously I am quite envious of this but on looking and investigating these dear friends more closely noted how they liked to have a glass or two or bottle of wine with their dinner. They live in houses with big strong thick doors.... do you see where i'm getting! These poor babies are probably waking up screaming onto deaf ears.
OR
The best conversation I had, which makes everyone a better mother (no neglect here) was when I asked a mother of 4 (FOUR can you believe it) if her 17 month old baby slept through the night.
"Yes" she replied, "he's very good. He only wakes up for a drink a couple of times" So my conclusion of this conversation is that waking up twice in the night is actually classed as sleeping through, in which case I have been complaining almost completely unnecessarily for the past 5 years and should start telling people that my children too, do sleep through the night.
This blog in no way tries to tell you how to get your children to sleep, but it you WERE to ask I have two answers:
1. Put them in bed with you (shock horror, who just fainted in disgust). Your bed will always be more comforting than theirs OR if you think its time they should be in their own bed/cot
2. Sleep in their cot with them (this isn't so helpful though to my friend who is 6ft 1. I myself being under 5ft actually find this quite an acceptable alternative)
I am actually genuinely proud of my 5 year old as she really does sleep through the night now, because I am able to check on her every time I get up with the toddler. Oh, and I bribed her a lot. She had a very special chart titled "I will not ANNOY Mummy or Daddy in the night" because when it was just titled "I will not get up in the night" she would just shout at us from her room. Now, over two weeks and a 2nd hand ebay dolls dress later everyone (apart from the teething toddler, oh and me) is happy with the sleeping pattern.... Oh, except for my husband, whom I woke up at 4am this morning because I dreamt that we were both asleep in the cot with the toddler and he had squashed her. Suffice to say it was only a dream!
On a final note, someone once emailed me possibly the BEST story book EVER. If you can understand any of my blog above, please check out Adam Mansbach's book "Go the F*** to sleep".
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